Monday, January 4, 2016

A Whole New Year



Hi. How are you?  It's been awhile, hasn't it? Almost a full 365 days, in fact, since my last blog post. Oh, I've been around on facebook, instagram, and twitter (albeit less often), and I've tried keeping up with peeps on blogs, but man there's an acre of sewing folk now!  The Sewcialists' Firehose now has an impressive list of people, new ones joining often. Despite being one of the founders I've neglected our movement completely for some time now. I have to give mad props to Gillian of Crafting a Rainbow for tending the fires and keeping them going.

So why have I been not blogging? There are many reasons, the biggest being my mental and physical health. I know I have talked about chronic pain, depression, and anxiety a good bit on this blog. What I didn't want to blog about was how much time and money I've spent on specialist after specialist. I didn't want to fall into the "I'm sorry for being a bad blogger, I'll try to blog more" trap. I didn't want to whine publicly about how crappy I felt. To be honest, most of the time I tell people I'm fine when I'm not because I just want to be normal.  (I don't do this with people close to me though, they can see through the lie)

Now, however, I finally have a solid diagnosis, fibromyalgia (details here if you want to know more).  It's a contentious condition with many doctors still not believing it real, and then there's whole "It's all in your head" spiel we get, especially as a woman. The ironic part is that it IS a great deal all in my head, because that's how these illnesses work, it's the brain and nervous system malfunctioning and firing off constantly.  Sometimes it will subside for months at a time, though not for me as of yet.  It comes with a host of sub-illnesses, and it is usually set off by traumatic events, and there's been no shortage of those in my life. In short, I spent much of 2015 re-evaluating my limitations and finding my center.

I think I'm close to finding my center, or as close as i'm going to get for now.  I found that I do miss writing and sharing my creations and creative process. I like sharing the weird bits of my life, too. I think this year I am finally ready to come out of the cocoon, and spread my wings and understand it's OK if they can't range as far as they used to. I want to enjoy the now and look forward to new things in 2016. This should be an adventure.





15 comments:

  1. I didn't realize it's fibro. I do have quite a bit of second-hand experience with it, as my mom has it. So I do know about how much work it can be just to get through the day sometimes. I hope you find a way to manage it well, and have a healthier 2016.

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    1. Thank you. I sympathize with your mom, for sure.

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    2. I wish you didn't have to deal with it, but you do, and you will. Love Dad.

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  2. Wow, has it really been a year? I'm so glad I've got you on other media. I'd love to read your posts again, though. I hope you have made progress and that the work you've done pays off. Xo!

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  3. Nothing wrong with taking a break from blogging (there was a whole year between my last two posts too)! I'm glad you're feeling up to it again. And I'm always glad when you make appearances on IG and Twitter. =)

    I hope this year brings improvements in all areas of your life! I know just having a real diagnosis must help a lot.

    ~ Brooke

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    1. I've been sure of what it was for over a year I just needed confirmation. This meant all the different tests to rule everything else out. But now my pain doctor is treating it properly.

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  4. Big, huge, massive hugs!! I'm glad you finally have a diagnosis! Wishing you a good 2016. :)

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  5. Good to see you back and glad you have a diagnosis. Hope to see you around more often!

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    1. Thank you, I really do miss blogging!

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  6. Good to see you back and glad you have a diagnosis. Hope to see you around more often!

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  7. Glad you have a diagnosis and that you checked in. I hope to see more of your posts in the future, but as a fellow chronic pain sufferer, I know how difficult it can be. I feel good when I get one post out per month. :)

    Take care!

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  8. Hopefully that will help you get appropriate treatment! Glad to hear your voice again ;)

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  9. I am very happy you finally have the condition confirmed by the doctors. As you say it will help with the pain management, as in getting proper treatment by the "Pain Management Doctor". I wish to heaven that you did not have the illness at all. I now make sure to include you in all my prayers, as I do for my own issues. God Bless, Dad.

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